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In a dimly lit, candle-filled bedroom smelling of incense and female sex, Mandy rested at Melissa’s side, her leg draped across Melissa’s torso, a hand covering her left breast. Without a male presence, the women tended toward fluid, sensual, leisurely sex, sex that took time and was patient and completely unconcerned with any final payoff. For these girls, affection never ended with an orgasm.

Joe was at work that night, operating one of his two steak house restaurants. One of the assistant managers had quit unexpectedly, leaving the crew short-handed. Joe didn’t mind working that night – he knew his wife and Mandy were getting together again. Working at his restaurant was just as good as being home.

At ten, Joe left the restaurant to go meet the girls at Mandy’s place. He rang the doorbell and was invited in by his wife. Both women wore bath robes and had been lounging in the living room, listening to the radio. Mandy poured Joe a soft drink.

“Did you girls have fun?”

“Yes, we sure did,” Melissa said. “Come, sit down and join us.”

Joe looked toward Mandy for approval and she nodded affirmatively. Joe took a seat on the couch between them, then wrapped his arms around both girls. Melissa leaned up and kissed him, then felt for an erection through his trousers.

“You need to get out of these,” Melissa said.

“I’ll help him,” Mandy offered.

Mandy took her time unbuckling Joe’s belt and lowering his pants. Joe wriggled around, trying to provide her the opportunity to remove them. At last, Mandy succeeded and tossed them to the side. Joe wore boxers, and it was a simple matter to pull his erection through the small opening.

“Oh, man, that feels so good,” Joe whispered.

Mandy licked the firm mushroom head of his erection. She tasted a small drop that had formed at the tip, then sucked him deeper into her mouth. Joe sighed through the kiss he shared with his wife. He reshuffled, relaxed and allowed the women to take over.

There were no explicit rules to their budding relationship. The three of them had only the unspoken understanding that they were friends, experimenting and sharing sex in various ways, and watching out and protecting each other.

Sometimes, Joe couldn’t believe his good fortune. Here he had not one, but two wonderful women he could enjoy, both emotionally and sexually. He loved sex with them both, he loved sex with his wife, he loved to be teased with the details about what the girls did without him. It was an erotically charged affair.

However, Joe also began to feel slighted. Melissa had two lovers she could see individually or together, but Joe could only enjoy sex with his wife or sex with the two of them together. Although not stated outright, it appeared that the door was closed to Joe and Mandy having sex together without Melissa. It also appeared that Joe would not be enjoying intercourse with Mandy, either. He had no way of knowing, but he suspected that the girls had, for some reason, drawn a line at full intercourse between Mandy and Joe. There were good reasons for this, he supposed – Mandy would certainly not want to carry Joe’s child, for example.

Yet, the days passed and the situation began to eat away at him. Why was he not allowed to have full sex with Mandy? Why could Melissa see Mandy one-on-one and not him? Was he not trusted? Was he becoming extraneous?

“Shut up,” Joe mumbled to himself. “You have a wife you love. You have great sex, your wife is happier than she has ever been before. You have a situation most guys would dream to have.”

He knew this to be true, but he also found himself becoming more self-absorbed, more jealous. What he really wanted was full intercourse with Mandy, one-on-one. Then they would all be on equal terms. Then everything would be fair.

– – – – –

“I don’t think that will happen,” Melissa told Joe as she folded laundry one day in their bedroom.

“Oh, well,” Joe mumbled. “Why not?”

“I’m not sure. I guess it’s just my impression that she doesn’t want to do that. Maybe I’m wrong.”

“Huh, that’s interesting,” Joe said. His rejected feelings dripped through his words like flour through a sifter.

“Oh god,” Mandy turned to her husband. “You’re jealous.”

“No, no, it’s okay. I’m just wondering what the rules are, how we expect this to work.”

“I don’t think there are any rules. We haven’t set any.”

“I know.”

“I’ll ask Mandy. But, I have to admit that the idea of you having full sex with Mandy scares me.”

“Why?”

“Pregnancy. I don’t know…I guess it’s not fair that I get to have her, you know? I guess I should have seen this coming.”

“What coming?”

“That you would want some action, too. Alone with somebody else.”

Joe knew he had to tread carefully. He sighed and went downstairs to the living room, sat down and stared out the window. The day was partly cloudy and warm. Joe peered across the cul-de-sac and saw Mandy on her knees, gardening at the side of her house. He watched her work.

Joe felt as Ankara escort if he had vertigo, standing on the edge of a cliff, needing to watch his next move as if his life depended upon it. If he pushed this issue – full intercourse with Mandy – it could burst the entire euphoric bubble he and his wife had occupied since they had met Mandy. They enjoyed her so much, in ways that went beyond sex; she was bubbly, charming, friendly and honest. She had helped out when Melissa’s mother needed to be moved to an Alzheimer’s facility. Her spirit had reignited something within both Melissa and Joe. They found a renewed lust for each other, for life and, yes, for Mandy.

Yet, was it fair for his wife to be able to have sex with someone else, one-on-one, outside the marriage and not him? When he followed the logic of these thoughts, he felt used, as if his wife were somehow entitled to more than he was. He deserved Mandy. He deserved sex outside the marriage, too. He wanted more.

Yes, he was jealous. He was confused and upset, unsure of himself. Deep down, he really didn’t want to wreck this new three-way relationship with Mandy, either. It was, above all else, exciting.

– – – – –

“No, I won’t do that,” Mandy sighed. “I don’t want to fuck your husband.”

“I knew that, Mandy. I hadn’t even given it any thought….”

“He’s upset, isn’t he?” Mandy queried.

“I think he is. He seems unsure of himself suddenly. He’s brooding.”

“Brooding isn’t good. I think that means he hasn’t felt involved, Melissa. He’s lonely.”

“Huh. Maybe. He’d never admit it.”

“I need to talk with him, Melissa.”

“Just you?”

“No, I want you there, too,” Mandy decided.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Anything, sweetie.”

“Do you see this as a kind of three-way relationship now? Rather than just you and I, now it’s the three of us?”

“I try not to define things,” Mandy explained.

“Do you love Joe?”

“Yes. Not in the same way you do, of course, but yes. He is a good man. He’s the strong, sexy silent type. He is always there, would fight to the death for you but he keeps his emotions inside.”

“He really thinks you’re awesome, Mandy. I think he would never say he loves you, but I think he does in a way.”

“Well, love is a term that means different things to different people at different times. Try to pin it down and it’ll fly away. But, god, it’s nice to hear anyway…”

Mandy’s voice trailed off and she stood thinking for a second.

“Listen, I’d like to take you two somewhere tomorrow. I need to tell you some things that you both deserve to hear.”

Melissa hugged Mandy tight. “Okay. You have me curious…”

“Oh, no,” Mandy shook her head. “This must wait until tomorrow.”

– – – – –

“Listen,” Mandy began as she pulled her red sedan out of her driveway toward some unknown destination. Melissa was seated by her side, shotgun-style, and Joe voluntarily took a seat in the back.

“I need to explain something…about myself, but I’m scared…I’ve never talked about this. To anyone.”

“That’s okay, take your time,” Melissa said supportively. “We’re here.”

Mandy took a deep breath. Joe and Melissa were dead silent. Mandy had not appeared nervous before, to either of them, but her normally sweet face showed both tension and sadness. Joe listened intently, but otherwise said nothing. Melissa turned toward Mandy.

“I guess I should start at the beginning. I was twenty years old,” Mandy started. “I was…in love…”

– – – – –

Mandy and Alex had been dating for only a month, but the two were wildly in love. They basked in the naiveté of their relative youth, hurtling through life together without pause or thought. For Mandy, Alex was perfect – powerful, stolid, loyal and boyishly handsome. Alex thought Mandy was an angel assigned to his life to protect him, comfort him and keep him grounded in reality.

On one particular day, Mandy and Alex found themselves aboard a small airplane. They wore thick green jumpsuits to protect them from the cold. The heavy parachutes behind them were strapped, like an intricate web, to their bodies. Mandy checked and triple-checked every buckle and strap to make sure everything was as it should be. In truth, she knew nothing about parachuting, but checking everything kept her mind busy.

“This is fucking crazy!” Mandy screamed at Alex. The side door of the airplane was fully open. The combined noise of the aircraft and the air rushing through the body of the plane was intense, but Alex understood what Mandy was saying. “If I live through this, you better buy me something nice!”

“You’ll love it! Believe me!”

Mandy trusted Alex completely. They had met at a party thrown by one of Mandy’s college friends and fell for each other immediately. Mandy had been a hard-working student in school and a member of the gymnastics team; as such, she had been too busy for much of a social life. Alex rearranged her priorities immediately.

“Oh god,” Mandy yelled through the roar Ankara escort bayan of the air through the door. “I can’t do this. I can’t.”

Alex held Mandy at the edge of the airplane. They were the last of the jumpers to leave the relative security of the plane and begin their descent toward the ground at terminal velocity.

“You can do anything,” Alex whispered in her ear. Mandy looked into Alex’s eyes and found only complete confidence. He kissed her warmly. His strength gave her strength, and eventually she found the nerve to leap from the edge into the great abyss below. Alex followed shortly behind.

The descent was exhilarating. Mandy screamed in complete joy as she danced weightlessly through the atmosphere. Alex was right there with her, having caught up to her during their fall. They shared a quick, messy kiss before they needed to separate and activate their parachutes.

“That was fucking amazing!” Mandy yelled, her arms spread out above her head. The touchdown had been rough, but painless. Mandy was elated. “That was the most incredible thing of all time!”

“I knew you’d love it,” Alex responded with a big smile. They hugged and kissed and danced, enjoying the unique high that came with such an experience.

– – – – –

Mandy and Alex were in their early twenties then, soaking up life as a couple. Alex was an average-looking man, medium build but well-toned from his various athletic pursuits. His personality is what drew Mandy; he was boyish and eternally young, willing to take chances and live life on the edge. Mandy, having been out of the social loop for years, loved having her own chaperone to life’s grand adventures.

“You are beautiful, baby,” Alex told her one day. “You are my shining light. I want you in my life forever.”

“Are you serious?” Mandy told him, hugging him and looking straight into his eyes.

“Yes. I could look around for years, decades, dating different women but I’d be wasting my time. You are what I want.”

“Wow…” Mandy didn’t know how to respond. Everyone told them they made a cute couple, but cute didn’t always translate into a successful long-term relationship.

“Someday I will ask you to marry me.”

“And someday I will say yes,” Mandy replied without hesitation

“I love you, Mandy. Always.”

“Forever,” she replied with a big smile.

– – – – –

Alex and Mandy worked to build careers. Alex obtained a degree in geology, a profession he hoped would allow him to get out of the office occasionally and tour the great outdoors. Mandy signed up for a college program that would prepare her for a career in real estate. The prospect of decorating, repairing and selling houses – as well as helping people to purchase a home for themselves and their family – proved too tantalizing for her to pass up.

In between work and classes, they had fun. Alex offered to take Mandy scuba diving one week in Hawaii, and once again Mandy found that she would follow Alex anywhere without hesitation. In the ocean’s depths, she saw many brightly colored fish, coral reefs, an octopus trying to hide down at the surface and a manta ray gliding across the bottom. Mandy was always watchful for the killer sharks – which she was certain were out there, having watched Jaws several times – but there were none to be found. After each of their adventures, Mandy and Alex would return to civilization and make passionate love for hours. Their scuba diving expedition was no exception.

“What I adore about you,” Alex told Mandy as they lounged side-by-side. “Is how balanced you are. You stay on an even-keel.”

“Balanced?”

“Yeah. I’m all over the place, I want to keep moving, doing things and enjoying life to the fullest, but one look at you and I know that you one are the one thing I would never want to let go.”

“You’re so kind, sir. You are my knight, you know,” Mandy beamed. “I would stay at home, working and doing chores every day, but you show me things and take me places. You pull me from my shell and show me the world.”

“Maybe we’re a perfect match.”

“Looks like it.”

“Someday, of course, I will ask you to marry me.”

“And someday, of course, I will say yes.”

“We’ll have kids, too.”

“Lots of them.”

They kissed, hugged and made love again.

– – – – –

In Zion National Park in southern Utah, there is a place called ‘The Narrows’. To reach this area, a person needs to hike along a river bed that stays dry during many of the summer months. Here, red and brown cliffs reach to the heavens on either side of the river bed as you walk between. You watch the vertical cliffs close in on both sides as you head north, hoping beyond hope that a passing summer thunderstorm won’t come along to flood the area.

It is here, on a bright summer day, where Alex finally proposed to Mandy.

“Yes. Yes. Yes.” Mandy replied, leaping into his arms. “I will marry you.”

“Thank you, Mandy.”

“Thank you? For what?”

“For allowing me into your life.”

“Oh baby, Escort Ankara I am the lucky one.”

The two continued their hike through Zion, laughing and skipping along, planning their future lives together.

– – – – –

Three months later, Alex went to the hospital for testing after discovering blood in places where there should be no blood. The diagnosis was crushing and final: End stage cancer. The doctors could attempt aggressive chemotherapy, perhaps radiation therapy, but the track record of curing cancer in such a late stage was very poor.

Mandy cried endlessly, day and night. She was in denial and wanted Alex to fight the cancer, to pull every trick from the book to beat it. It was so unfair, she thought, for cancer to strike someone so hard at such a young age. It couldn’t possibly be correct. They would beat this after all.

“This is insane, Alex. People in their twenties do NOT get cancer. These doctors must be wrong.”

They were not wrong. Alex chose not to fight the cancer.

“I don’t know how long I’ll last, but I want to enjoy every moment. I don’t want to sacrifice my time feeling sick and vomiting and taking meds and losing my hair. If I go out, it’ll be my way, baby.”

“I need you, Alex. I need you…”

Alex hugged Mandy tight.

“I can’t let you go,” Mandy sobbed. “We have so much more life to live…”

“I’m sorry, baby…I’m so sorry…”

“You’re sorry?”

“Yeah,” Alex kissed Mandy on the forehead. “You don’t deserve this burden.”

“You are never a burden, my love. Never.”

Days turned to weeks and eventually turned to months. Alex and Mandy spent every moment together they could – returning to Hawaii to scuba dive, learning to kayak from a friend, hiking around Mount Rainier in Washington and driving across the country to Acadia Park in Maine. They enjoyed every moment, but Mandy often cried at random moments every day and Alex always hugged her tight. Words failed them at this point; all they had was time.

Alex’s health began to fail several months later, approximately four years from when they began dating. Mandy was inconsolable. She was there for Alex at every step, staying with him at the hospital continuously.

“I don’t know what to do, Alex. You are my life. We had plans. A future.”

“You’ll be fine, Mandy. You have a long life ahead of you.” Alex was tired now, and in some pain.

“I wanted you to be a part of that.”

“I know. It sucks, huh?”

Mandy chuckled. This was part of Alex’s charm, laughing in the face of danger. Unfortunately, his health continued to decline rapidly. The doctor’s and nurses were visibly surprised and upset, too – it was a shock to see someone so young, so full of life, waylaid by cancer.

“I’ll miss you so much, baby,” Mandy told him in his final days.

“Live life to the fullest, Mandy. Hold nothing back.”

“Yeah…”

Alex reached over the steel rail of the hospital bed and grabbed Mandy’s arm to get her attention.

“No, no, no. Don’t put me off,” Alex scolded.

“Okay, I’m sorry, I…”

“Look at me.”

“Okay.”

“In the eye.”

“Okay.”

“Enjoy life. Hold nothing back.”

Mandy nodded. She understood.

Alex died the next day.

– – – – –

Mandy kissed the tips of her fingers then reached out and touched Alex’s headstone, as her friends, Melissa and Joe, stood behind her.

“This is my Alex,” she said. “He was one wild guy. I loved him with all my heart.”

“He sounded great,” Melissa whispered, tears welling up. She wasn’t sure how to respond or console her friend.

“He was amazing,” Mandy replied. “He was filled with so much energy.”

Joe stood by silently, feeling like a complete idiot. The issues he had brought up regarding their three way relationship were small and petty.

“I wanted you both to know about this,” Mandy said. “I love you both. You have treated me so well, made me feel so comfortable and safe.”

“Safe?”

“I haven’t dated anyone since. I haven’t had sex with anyone since. I wanted to be alone for so long.”

“I can understand that,” Melissa said. “This must have been so hard.”

“Alex would have chewed me out,” Mandy said with a short laugh. “Hold nothing back, he told me.”

“You’ve done the best you can,” Melissa answered, trying to be supportive but feeling inadequate.

Mandy turned to Melissa. “You two have been exactly what I need. You have been my friends, supported me, made me feel special and wanted. You have allowed me to open up and experience the world again.”

“Maybe the sex was going too far.”

“Nah,” Mandy sighed. “I need to start somewhere. Sex and love and friendship are part of life. I need to begin feeling these things again.”

“Well, the feeling is mutual,” Joe finally spoke up. “We were depressed and angry, remember?”

“You pulled us out of our dead zone and showed us a whole new way to look at the world.” Melissa added.

“Then it’s good our paths crossed. We seem to need each other,” Mandy interjected wistfully.

“I’m really sorry,” Joe finally spoke up. “I feel so bad for making a stink about…”

Mandy went to Joe and wrapped her arms around him. “You just said what you felt, Joe. That’s all.”

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