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“It’s my company, so I am biased.”
“Does anyone else freak out like this their first time?”
“Most new clients get nervous, Gretel,” Abbey told her from the other side of the imposing mahogany desk.
Her arms were shaking.
“Let’s sit over here.” In her Italian wool suit, Abbey guided Gretel across the floor of her executive suite to the loveseat.
“I am usually a calm person, really, I am.” Gretel’s calves wiggled in her yellow rain boots.
“To answer your question, you are correct. It’s not normal, or average, for women to directly pay for male companionship. That doesn’t mean it’s unnatural. I have run this enterprise for around fifteen years. Wow. It has been that long.”
“I’ve heard your business is growing. Besides me, obviously. Therefore, I should stop thinking of myself as the only woman hiring an escort.”
“Hundreds have come before you. And, with my help, they come a lot more often, thank you very much.”
The two women chuckled.
“Have you ever… I mean, with another agency, of course, but…” Gretel wrung her hands.
“Have I ever hired a male escort for my personal enjoyment?” Abbey scrunched her nose. “I have considered the option, so that I can better relate to my club’s members. I have had offers from other agents in the industry. My partner Jed gave me the green light, for research purposes. But I never… a fitting opportunity has not presented itself.”
“I have thought about joining your club for ages. I only found the courage this year, and it took me weeks to finally make the call.”
Abbey placed her arm around her client’s trembling shoulders. “We are thrilled to have you. We will take good care of you. I already have a suitor in mind who will put you at ease.”
“He’s not going to be super young? Or much older than me?”
“No, Goldilocks, he will be just right.”
Gretel relaxed. Her flat-ironed, onyx hair grazed the collar of her Peter Pan collar. “I will trust your judgment.”
“What additional questions can I answer for you before we pick a time for you to meet your match?”
“Has anyone ever fallen in love? That would seem unethical and delusional and creepy.”
“It has happened once. Mutually. Surprisingly rare, in my experience building this firm. The one occurence of a client and a suitor falling in love with each other, our whole team was in shock. However, we pulled ourselves together for the wedding. They said goodbye to the club, moved to a flyover state, and remain happily married.”
She fiddled with the short bangs framing her brown forehead. “Has a pairing ever gone wrong?”
“Occasionally couplings are reshuffled. That is why we monitor your first few dates.”
“Video cameras? I read the surveillance paragraphs in the paperwork I signed. Someone will watch us talk and eat and… conjugate?”
“Yes.” Abbey placed her palms on her thighs.
“I have never had a third party watch me, that I am aware of, during an intimate encounter. I guess all the previous members have done it, so I might as well.”
“Most of them have. Not all. Some take the relationship slowly. Intercourse does not necessarily appear as the first, second, or twentieth item on every member’s menu. Companionship is often the main course.”
Gretel released a sigh of relief. She patted the hem of her red kilt over her navy leggings. “Then I will start with an appetizer platter. I’ve done stuff. A lot of stuff. Not many activities I was fond of, because of the people involved.”
“What sort of activities have you fancied in the past?”
Gretel’s hands flew to her hot cheeks.
Abbey assured her, “If you don’t want to, we don’t have to discuss-“
“I want to. I need to. So that you know who would be good for me.”
“Sometimes I like penetration. In front or in back. In my mouth?” Gretel shrugged. “Maybe.”
“Are there actions you enjoy on your own that you may like to try Escort Bayan with a partner?”
“I like rubbing.” She pointed to her crotch area of her plaid skirt.
“Stimulating your clitoris?”
“On the outside of my panties while I read fanfiction. I put a finger inside to feel how wet I am getting to determine which stories turn me on the most.”
“Thanks.” Gretel crossed her legs towards Abbey. “Even though I doubt any stallions in your stable would be interested in browsing Sherlock/Elementary crossover slashfic with me.”
“I’m sure one of them could be convinced.”
After discussing logistical details, the pair chose a square on the calendar for Gretel’s first date. By the time Abbey walked her out of the office and towards the elevator, Gretel had transformed from skittish about her desires to eager for her initial rendezvous.
“Nice job, boss.”
Abbey was both startled and pleased, as usual, to hear the voice of her star employee Will. He was leaning on her assistant Doug’s desk.
“Thanks.” She spied a sneaky camaraderie brewing between her two team members. “What’s going on here?”
The men exchanged a secretive glance. Will straightened his posture. “That’s what I traveled down the hall to your office to ask you about.”
Doug cleared his throat.
“Tell you about,” Will amended.
Abbey waved him through the heavy door of her suite. “Come inside.”
“Though it could make our arrangement a bit awkward-“
“You want Doug?” Abbey rasped from the loveseat.
“We want your blessing.” Will stated from his armchair. “He and I are good together.”
“I didn’t realize you two were so close.”
“Strange bedfellows, etc.”
“How long has this been going on?”
“Since you returned from D.C. engaged to Jed. And now Jed’s here, living in your condo. Not that your impending nuptials have anything to do with-“
“It makes sense,” Abbey granted. “Doug needs a bigger challenge, and you need his expertise. And now that he plans to lead operations for your events division of the company, apparently I need a new assistant.”
Will fist pumped the air. “One molehill conquered, a myriad more to go.”
“You keep me on my toes.”
“Continuously pushing me out of my comfort zone.”
From his adjacent seat, Will gazed at her. “You are the one who made me your partner.”
“I did not make you do anything. I asked, and you accepted my investment offer.”
He glanced at the closed door. “What else would you like to ask me?”
“Nothing I can think of. Why?”
“I have an hour until my next meeting, I don’t particularly want to stroll back to my office beforehand, and talking with you counts as work,” Will conveyed.
“It doesn’t feel like work!” he clarified.
“Want to help me brainstorm one more case, for old times’ sake? Before I delegate the process to the Onboarding and Orientation team next month?”
“Sure, storm it up. Let’s get wet. I mean, our brains. From the rain that drips from… Where’s your laptop?”
“I contemplated coupling her with Robert-“
“You know I never question your wisdom, Abbey-“
“I know no such thing.”
With both of their butts squished together on the leather cushion, Will raised his qualms about his colleague. “From what you have imparted about Gretel, she is a sensitive individual with eclectic tastes.”
“She is unconventional, in comparison to my common constituency of billionaires’ wives, who are consistently two C-sections and one emotional breakdown removed from the international pageant circuit. Gretel didn’t marry rich. She made her own millions, i.e. the type of member I anticipate attracting more often. Albeit, she had the cushion of family money.”
“Your exact words were, ‘Gretel is the only Manic Pixie Dream Girl I can tolerate for longer than Escort sixty seconds.'”
Abbey was aghast. “I said that? Out loud?”
“It was five minutes ago!”
“I blame my perimenopause,” she harrumphed. “43 is a fine age.”
“I look forward to joining your forgetful state in a few years,” Will jested.
Abbey peeked at the empty armchair Will had abandoned to sit next to her. She recalled the steamy encounter that Jed had concocted on that very piece of furniture a while ago, involving Jed eating his own cum out of Abbey’s pulsing pussy while Will and two of his fellow suitors watched and stroked about a foot away. The incident was never replicated, and none of the other four participants ever spoke of it, acknowledging Abbey’s adherence to professionalism and propriety. She wondered if Will’s DNA was still detectable in the fibers of the nearby patch of carpet that he had ejaculated on. “Why not Robert?”
“Too straight laced, mainstream vanilla. He wouldn’t appreciate her references. Charlie would have fun with her.”
“Charlie is a contender, so gregarious and knowledgeable and plugged into current events.”
“If Gretel brings up a topic he isn’t familiar with, Charlie will research it so well he’ll know more about it than she does for their following date. Unlike Robert, who will ignore the topic and hope she doesn’t mention it again.”
“Plus, Charlie’s darn cute. Is he too young?”
“He’s a year older than you are.”
“Abbey, you recruited him. You rolled out his birthday cake at the office party this summer.”
“I was going to suggest Matt, since he has a stable, mature yet cheerful vibe-“
“And, from all accounts, an amazing bedside manner. Couchside manner. Closet, shower, wherever you want to get down, Matt brings the heat. Although, Charlie maneuvers cerebrally, a grower, not a shower, in seduction. The romance sneaks up on you so artfully that his conjugal bliss emerges not as a foregone conclusion, but as an illuminating voyage on the waves of carnal enlightenment.” With a deep exhale, he loosened his Tudor Rose print tie.
“Will, would you like to be matched with Charlie as well?”
He blew a raspberry at her. “As a retired stud put out to pasture, I celebrate the excellence of a fellow erotic virtuoso.”
“Charlie is the one.” He clicked on a thumbnail to expand the profile on Abbey’s screen. “In these delicate situations, I usually volunteer as tribute, but new year, new me.”
“New year is coming soon. Are we locking in my choice for Gretel?”
Abbey restored a window and typed a message. “Sending our decision to the O & O team. Done. Tell me about the new Will.”
He crossed his ankles under the coffee table. “More quality time with the twins, as they enter puberty, which is smellier than I had anticipated. Are the four of us still on for lunch this weekend, what with Jed-”
“Yes. I am excited to meet your pungent preteens. Jed can entertain himself on Saturday.”
Will smiled. “No more suiting. I have said goodbye to the last of my patrons.”
“Which gives you the room you had expressed that you required to build a relationship. How does Brielle fit into your plan?”
Will’s eyes widened and dilated. “I didn’t get a chance to introduce you to her at the Pixie-Bob fiesta, due to the unexpected turn of events. She is darling.”
“Will is finally settling down,” Abbey uttered through a clenched smile.
He shook his head. “We’re enjoying each other’s company. Open, casual, no labels. Though, I will say, she makes me happy.”
Abbey had no reply.
“We have not yet approached Abbey and Jed commitment levels,” he continued, “but Brielle is the kind of woman who could worm her way into my heart and take up residence for an extended period.” Will stood up from the loveseat and wandered to the exit. “Just like you, Abbey.”
She watched Bayan Escort him leave. The heavy door shut behind him.
That night, Abbey caressed Jed’s stubbly cheek as he performed his oral duties on her nether regions.
“What are you pondering?” Jed asked, the tip of his tongue swirling on her inner labia. “Because I am delivering some of my best work, and I am not achieving the results I’m used to.”
In her Winnie-the-Pooh style attire, Abbey urged Jed to sit next to her bare bottom on the blanket. “Why do you think I have never engaged a suitor of my own?”
He scooted closer wearing only a pair of bulldog boxers. “Do you want to?”
“Am I a baker who is sick of eating cake? A butcher who can no longer eat beef?”
He caressed Abbey’s belly button under her red t-shirt. “I have a theory that could be mistaken for self aggrandizement, but hear me out.”
She kissed the nape of his pale neck. “I am listening.”
“The majority of the women you serve are unsatisfied with their relationships. Either they are trapped in disappointing marriages, or they cannot find what they are looking for in their interactions with men. These circumstances leave them longing for a connection with a man who provides compassion, caring, other C words.”
“Whereas you appear to find delightful gratification in your existing, unpaid relationships with men.”
“Relationships plural?” Abbey cocked her head. “Jed, you are my only boyfriend. Partner. Fiancé.”
“Are you satisfied with the male presence in your life?”
“That separates you from your club members, and from many hetero women in general. Their partners often don’t know what they want, or their partners don’t care. The most twisted men like having sexually unfulfilled wives. They don’t believe women should take pleasure in physical intimacy. I am not one of those men.”
“Therefore, I don’t yearn to procure a compensated specialist? Due to your emotional intelligence?”
Jed grinned. “Partially. Have you ever speculated why I have never solicited a professional playmate?”
“I presumed you had before you met me.”
“So, when I was in college? In high school? When have I had the opportunity to enlist a sex worker?”
“Do you want to?”
“No. I want to explore with you. We tell each other what we want and how we like it. We communicate. I want to continue communicating with you about everything, forever.”
Abbey embraced her partner and squeezed him tight. “Why are you so wonderful?”
“I have had two decades of assistance. May I resume my licking?”
Abbey released him. She reclined onto the already damp blanket, spread her thick thighs, and slid her thumb across her swollen clit. “I’m ready.”
Jed crawled to his previous position. He pressed his pink lips against her brown hood.
Abbey’s dark curls surrounded her head on the pillow. She allowed Jed to consume her, employing skills he had developed over the course of their two-decade, two-coast relationship. His nose landed on her balmy crease. His graying mustache mingled with the coils of her bush. His enthusiasm enhanced her elation. He dipped a finger inside, pulled it out, then slithered it between her plump cheeks.
As her ecstasy swelled, Abbey felt her legs quiver. Her knees knocked against his ears. She sensed Jed’s rocking against the bed, humping the mattress with his fat cock, his mouth maintaining the suction on her vulva.
The squirts began as a light mist on Jed’s nostrils then became a steady stream of lady cum from his forehead to his chin as Abbey bucked around his talented tongue.
Once the quakes had subsided into a dull rumble, Jed climbed up Abbey’s shuddering body, lowered his torso atop of hers, and rub his nose on hers. “If you like, I could retain a willing gentleman to perform similar services, for a price.”
Through her breathless rapture, Abbey snorted, “Why did I agree to marry you?”
“Because you love me in ways you’re not even aware of.”
Abbey reached for her nightstand, retrieved a wrapped condom from the drawer, and stuck the foil packet to her fiancé’s clammy forehead. “True.”
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